"I would certainly like my kids to avoid depression as much as possible, and to not engage in other behaviors such as drug use. So, what should I do?"
Apart from the issues you discussed, abstaining from social media and digital devices help to build a solid foundation for your children's psychological and social well-being. The essay I just posted today might be of interest to you: From Feeding Moloch to Digital Minimalism - child sacrifice, kicking the chair, and forming digital detox community.
Pretty sure I started out 40+ years ago thinking that gentle parenting was the answer, and luckily we had multiple kids and I realized that was not the best style of parenting (before those first two children grew up)! Structure and discipline are key, and the earlier the better. As one example, I liked a varying schedule and therefore did not start out with regular naptimes for my babies, which was unhappy for both the parents and the children. Some of us adults still struggle with structure and discipline, for many years. I wished those behaviors had been ingrained into my nature... However, I had living examples and samples around me so that I could see the impact and try to change away from gentle parenting to more structure and discipline.
Great article Jim! I'm only 8 years into parenting, but have really come to hate a lot of the rhetoric around gentle parenting. It's such an amorphous theory -- and obviously you shouldn't be a jerk to your kid -- but kids THRIVE on order, structure and routine. So do grownups, but unfortunately there's no one to make me go to bed on time, limit screens, and eat vegetables (even though I need it just as much as my kids do!)
"I would certainly like my kids to avoid depression as much as possible, and to not engage in other behaviors such as drug use. So, what should I do?"
Apart from the issues you discussed, abstaining from social media and digital devices help to build a solid foundation for your children's psychological and social well-being. The essay I just posted today might be of interest to you: From Feeding Moloch to Digital Minimalism - child sacrifice, kicking the chair, and forming digital detox community.
https://schooloftheunconformed.substack.com/p/from-feeding-moloch-to-digital-minimalism
Pretty sure I started out 40+ years ago thinking that gentle parenting was the answer, and luckily we had multiple kids and I realized that was not the best style of parenting (before those first two children grew up)! Structure and discipline are key, and the earlier the better. As one example, I liked a varying schedule and therefore did not start out with regular naptimes for my babies, which was unhappy for both the parents and the children. Some of us adults still struggle with structure and discipline, for many years. I wished those behaviors had been ingrained into my nature... However, I had living examples and samples around me so that I could see the impact and try to change away from gentle parenting to more structure and discipline.
Great article Jim! I'm only 8 years into parenting, but have really come to hate a lot of the rhetoric around gentle parenting. It's such an amorphous theory -- and obviously you shouldn't be a jerk to your kid -- but kids THRIVE on order, structure and routine. So do grownups, but unfortunately there's no one to make me go to bed on time, limit screens, and eat vegetables (even though I need it just as much as my kids do!)