Feb 25, 2023·edited Feb 25, 2023Liked by Jim Dalrymple II
My husband got a PhD in chemistry (and actually enjoys it!) but after two cross-country moves for a post-doc and them permanent work (he's in the somewhat niche field of nuclear medicine with limited employment options) — he recently declared "graduate school sucks" in one of our lower moments. Meaning: He and I miss our friends and family. Here we are in a town where most people are from the area (and get together with their extended family who live nearby)... and we are hours/days away from our own parents... trying to raise 3 tiny kids and rebuild friendship and community from scratch at the same time (and we've done this more than once.) We've realized the Wendell Berry Way may be idealized, but certainly has its relational benefits, which can lead to better life satisfaction and happiness. But hey, it's what our own parents did, move away for professional work. I suppose we have lots of years ahead of us to see how this turns out, see how we may view things differently. My husband and I have talked about how as we guide our 3 sons in the future, that we should discuss life trajectories (and the realistic benefits or challenges of, say, moving away from family for a job) as much as the practical job skills pursued. Because how or where those skills can be played out in the long-term (with a family) isn't always a consideration when you're young and bright-eyed!
yeah, I've come to a similar realization about talking to my own kids and their life trajectories. I'm not sure how much advice I would've taken as a kid and young adult, but the reality is that the entire system was focused on "getting a good job" and not on results/happiness. I'd at least like those things to be on my kids' radar.
I love this title "Imitate the happiest people you can find" - yes, of course we want to be happy, and to do so, yes, we should go to experts and emulate them... Thank you for the insights and discussion!
My husband got a PhD in chemistry (and actually enjoys it!) but after two cross-country moves for a post-doc and them permanent work (he's in the somewhat niche field of nuclear medicine with limited employment options) — he recently declared "graduate school sucks" in one of our lower moments. Meaning: He and I miss our friends and family. Here we are in a town where most people are from the area (and get together with their extended family who live nearby)... and we are hours/days away from our own parents... trying to raise 3 tiny kids and rebuild friendship and community from scratch at the same time (and we've done this more than once.) We've realized the Wendell Berry Way may be idealized, but certainly has its relational benefits, which can lead to better life satisfaction and happiness. But hey, it's what our own parents did, move away for professional work. I suppose we have lots of years ahead of us to see how this turns out, see how we may view things differently. My husband and I have talked about how as we guide our 3 sons in the future, that we should discuss life trajectories (and the realistic benefits or challenges of, say, moving away from family for a job) as much as the practical job skills pursued. Because how or where those skills can be played out in the long-term (with a family) isn't always a consideration when you're young and bright-eyed!
yeah, I've come to a similar realization about talking to my own kids and their life trajectories. I'm not sure how much advice I would've taken as a kid and young adult, but the reality is that the entire system was focused on "getting a good job" and not on results/happiness. I'd at least like those things to be on my kids' radar.
I love this title "Imitate the happiest people you can find" - yes, of course we want to be happy, and to do so, yes, we should go to experts and emulate them... Thank you for the insights and discussion!
Thank you!