"Ultimately, selflessly sharing resources with one’s partner is the absolute most basic level of village building, and if I can’t do that I might as well just give up on having something deeper and bigger."
I am continuously befuddled by the people in otherwise normal marriages just nickle and diming each other like college pals. Seriously, it's the weirdest. lol
My husband makes our family's salary (and he also needs *me* to keep our family afloat and our children cared for in turn) so it blows my mind trying to convert that mindset to our situation!
I'm glad you singled out that line. It was my wife's favorite while she was proof reading this for me (she proofs most these posts). And yeah, I just don't get it. All that rambling about villages aside, it just seems like a huge pain in the neck!
I’ve seen a tit-for-tat marriage self-destruct. Keeping score means no one’s a winner, in my view.
Also it’s important that both spouses have some understanding of how their finances work. I don’t think it’s healthy when one spouse abdicates all the $ issues to the other.
My husband and I had a financial planning course for our premarital counseling 18 yea ago because $ is the number 1 reason for split ups (not sure if that is still the case).
There needs to be a team-mentality for marriage! What are you building together? Not, am I getting my fair share?
As always, good stuff.
"Ultimately, selflessly sharing resources with one’s partner is the absolute most basic level of village building, and if I can’t do that I might as well just give up on having something deeper and bigger."
I am continuously befuddled by the people in otherwise normal marriages just nickle and diming each other like college pals. Seriously, it's the weirdest. lol
My husband makes our family's salary (and he also needs *me* to keep our family afloat and our children cared for in turn) so it blows my mind trying to convert that mindset to our situation!
I'm glad you singled out that line. It was my wife's favorite while she was proof reading this for me (she proofs most these posts). And yeah, I just don't get it. All that rambling about villages aside, it just seems like a huge pain in the neck!
I’ve seen a tit-for-tat marriage self-destruct. Keeping score means no one’s a winner, in my view.
Also it’s important that both spouses have some understanding of how their finances work. I don’t think it’s healthy when one spouse abdicates all the $ issues to the other.
My husband and I had a financial planning course for our premarital counseling 18 yea ago because $ is the number 1 reason for split ups (not sure if that is still the case).
There needs to be a team-mentality for marriage! What are you building together? Not, am I getting my fair share?
Totally agreed. Love the way your put it here: "What are you building together?"