How I Met Your Mother had the characters meet at college and later. They each had some dysfunction in their families. Reading your post, himym seems like the first chosen-family show.
New Girl makes a subtle point during a crossover episode they did in NYC with Brooklyn 99. At the very end they run into Coach, who points out that they did not call and let him know they were visiting, seeming put out, before brushing it off noting that he had been to LA several times without notifying them, either.
I haven't seen that episode, but it sounds like an interesting exploration of the impact of distance on relationships. I've actually done this same thing — as recently as last week. I know a bunch of people in NYC, but have called them up less and less over time as they recede in my list of relationships.
The trick with sitcoms is that they are modeled off of the elaborate convenience of the place you left remade with the people you choose. The opening song from Beauty and the Beast bemoaning provincial life is made tolerable with the clockwork of a chosen sub-village.
I love all of this, and it makes me think. I don't have any friends from when I grew up -- we moved around a lot and finally settled about halfway through my childhood in a rural part of Maine where everyone had lived for *generations*. I was never going to be one of them, though they were always friendly. I was also a loner and a homebody and usually satisfied with my own company. My siblings are much older than I am, so we weren't close growing up, either. So I entered adulthood with no long-standing friendships and no real idea of how to create them. But I got married young (at 23), to a man who is in daily contact with his two brothers (one a twin) and almost-daily contact with his parents and grandparents. I had never known people like that even existed until I met him. After living in various places for 15 years, we've now settled in a town about 20 minutes away from where he went to high school and only a morning's drive from where the rest of his family lives. And, come to think of it, one of my only years-long friendships is with a woman I met through my husband's brother. I never could have imagined this life for myself when I was 18, but maybe I found a version of the Geller clan after all...?
Great post! You've offered much food for thought.
(For what it's worth, I think you could make the case that Cheers also fits: they've all been drinking together for years by the time the show opens. Not family, per se, but definitely a long-standing relationship. And its spinoff series, Frasier, absolutely follows this setup.)
I can confirm, as a Brit, that I was also influenced by Friends into thinking the city life hanging with friends was the ideal future. There was a bit of that, but now in my thirties I've retreated further into the suburbs (nobody can afford central London anyway), and now with kids I see much more of my family. Even if it were about friends, Friends was a blip, at least for me.
How I Met Your Mother had the characters meet at college and later. They each had some dysfunction in their families. Reading your post, himym seems like the first chosen-family show.
That is a super interesting observation. I have not watched HIMYM, but probably should at this point. I will count it as "research" for this blog haha
New Girl makes a subtle point during a crossover episode they did in NYC with Brooklyn 99. At the very end they run into Coach, who points out that they did not call and let him know they were visiting, seeming put out, before brushing it off noting that he had been to LA several times without notifying them, either.
I haven't seen that episode, but it sounds like an interesting exploration of the impact of distance on relationships. I've actually done this same thing — as recently as last week. I know a bunch of people in NYC, but have called them up less and less over time as they recede in my list of relationships.
The trick with sitcoms is that they are modeled off of the elaborate convenience of the place you left remade with the people you choose. The opening song from Beauty and the Beast bemoaning provincial life is made tolerable with the clockwork of a chosen sub-village.
‘Friends’ should have been titled
‘Idiots who constantly misunderstand each other and frequently raise their voices in argument’
I love all of this, and it makes me think. I don't have any friends from when I grew up -- we moved around a lot and finally settled about halfway through my childhood in a rural part of Maine where everyone had lived for *generations*. I was never going to be one of them, though they were always friendly. I was also a loner and a homebody and usually satisfied with my own company. My siblings are much older than I am, so we weren't close growing up, either. So I entered adulthood with no long-standing friendships and no real idea of how to create them. But I got married young (at 23), to a man who is in daily contact with his two brothers (one a twin) and almost-daily contact with his parents and grandparents. I had never known people like that even existed until I met him. After living in various places for 15 years, we've now settled in a town about 20 minutes away from where he went to high school and only a morning's drive from where the rest of his family lives. And, come to think of it, one of my only years-long friendships is with a woman I met through my husband's brother. I never could have imagined this life for myself when I was 18, but maybe I found a version of the Geller clan after all...?
Great post! You've offered much food for thought.
(For what it's worth, I think you could make the case that Cheers also fits: they've all been drinking together for years by the time the show opens. Not family, per se, but definitely a long-standing relationship. And its spinoff series, Frasier, absolutely follows this setup.)
I can confirm, as a Brit, that I was also influenced by Friends into thinking the city life hanging with friends was the ideal future. There was a bit of that, but now in my thirties I've retreated further into the suburbs (nobody can afford central London anyway), and now with kids I see much more of my family. Even if it were about friends, Friends was a blip, at least for me.