I’ve always been interested in the fact that so many people have issues with so many other people in their lives. I live a fairly drama-free life with those around me and in a lot of ways, it’s almost like I’m the crazy one.
"In other words, more time together appears to actually be the antidote to fraying relationships — as counterintuitive as that sounds. The key, I think, is building a catalogue of positive experiences that form the foundation of the relationship, so that it’s not just all arguments and passive aggression."
This rings true. When someone has parents, siblings, perhaps other family hours or states away, it is hard to rack up those mundane, positive experiences. At least enough to offset any tension or passive aggressive arguments. Those negative experiences can become a bigger part of one's memory of the relationship, more than it otherwise would be.
I agree with everything Jim, but we also used to have a norm of not discussing religion or politics with anyone other than closest friends and family and I think that was a good norm and we should bring it back 🤣🤣🤣
Being the "weird uncle" vs "yeah, my Uncle Jim, he's kinda weird..." is concentration vs dispersion of the modifier. We do not give enough credit to people arranging social situations where what is weird about people are not the points getting highlighted. "Really? Tell me why you think that." can be gasoline.
I’ve always been interested in the fact that so many people have issues with so many other people in their lives. I live a fairly drama-free life with those around me and in a lot of ways, it’s almost like I’m the crazy one.
"In other words, more time together appears to actually be the antidote to fraying relationships — as counterintuitive as that sounds. The key, I think, is building a catalogue of positive experiences that form the foundation of the relationship, so that it’s not just all arguments and passive aggression."
This rings true. When someone has parents, siblings, perhaps other family hours or states away, it is hard to rack up those mundane, positive experiences. At least enough to offset any tension or passive aggressive arguments. Those negative experiences can become a bigger part of one's memory of the relationship, more than it otherwise would be.
Totally agree. My family is ten hours away, so any time we spend together is amplified - annoyances and all.
I agree with everything Jim, but we also used to have a norm of not discussing religion or politics with anyone other than closest friends and family and I think that was a good norm and we should bring it back 🤣🤣🤣
hear, hear!
Being the "weird uncle" vs "yeah, my Uncle Jim, he's kinda weird..." is concentration vs dispersion of the modifier. We do not give enough credit to people arranging social situations where what is weird about people are not the points getting highlighted. "Really? Tell me why you think that." can be gasoline.